Everything changes when you become a grown up. You don’t think it will happen to you, but it does, it just creeps up and becomes you at some point. You start finding yourself tutting at random things on the TV simply because they are suddenly and inexplicably irritating, you can find a piece of fruit ‘disappointing’, your arse decides to start giving you a round of applause every time you run up the stairs and it dawns on you that at some point you started making an ‘ugh’ noise when you struggle to try to get up off the floor. My advancing age (I’m old enough to keep forgetting how old I actually am- it’s somewhere approaching 37) doesn’t mean that I don’t still manage to live the rock and roll lifestyle regardless though, oh yes, you can have it all- just perhaps a sliiiiiiiightly different ‘all’ than I had in my teens. As I am known for my ridiculously active social life, I thought that it was only fitting for me to share my version of Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll for the Define’ Normal’ blog hop this week. I hope reading this doesn’t make you feel too old and farty.

SEX

You can tell a broody hen from the mad look in their eye and the fact they try and peck your hand off if you go anywhere near them

Ok, so there are plenty of things that I could share here, but, fear not  I shall leave that sort of confessional up to Jerry Springer and Jeremy Kyle respectively. As I mentioned last week, when I stopped having babies myself, I started having pets instead. Amongst our various ensemble we have managed to accidently acquire a couple of cockerels.

This one doesn’t peck

When they started molesting the various hens at every opportunity, apart from feeling rather sorry for the ladies, a little seed (accuse the pun) of an idea was planted. Sex = babies. Little, fluffy, cute babies that won’t keep me up in the middle of the night or whine at me with a nasal voice about how annoying their brother or sister is (or if they do all I’ll hear is a sweet little ‘cheeep cheep’, so I won’t care). As things generally go with me, it doesn’t take long until a little idea becomes a reality, and so the children and I have started a grow your own project which is enormously exciting. I’ll be setting up a separate page soon just for our little chickens-to-be. Want to turn up the heat in the bedroom? Check out True Pheromones products now.

Mwaaahaaahaaa… it’s aliiiiiiive, aliiiiiiiive I tell you!

DRUGS

Now, where to put it all…

Dominic’s stash

Obviously I’m a (relatively) responsible adult and I am not condoning the use of drugs… but in our house smallest child gets through so many that there is no such thing as simply ‘popping’ to the chemist to collect them anymore. The chemist knows us well and must make the staff draw short straws to see who has to haul Dominic’s prescription into a car and drive it to our house before dragging it up the drive to the front door. We certainly wouldn’t attempt to just pick it up if we happened to be in town. This kid is a virtual drug baron, although I don’t think the street value of lactulose is much these days. The rest of us are happy to make do with a Lemsip every now and again.

ROCK AND ROLL

Definitely too cool for school

It goes without saying that Dominic is a rock star from the tips of his sticky up hair down to the dancing toes on his permanently waggling happy feet. The kid can pull off the wearing-sunglasses-indoors look without even breaking a sweat. He loves buying his sunnies from https://www.glasseshut.co.uk. We all could learn a lot from the king of cool, and here, ladies and gentlemen, is a one time opportunity to do so. In this video Dominic shares his air guitar skills- a true rock star never misses an opportunity to perfect the technique, and in this instance he even managed to find his groove using the music from his DSi- ROCK ON!

As you can tell, we live life on the edge around here. Talking of which, it’s Saturday night, and I have better things to be doing than sitting here on the computer. It must be late enough for me to get away with putting on my pyjama bottoms by now, don’t you think? There is nothing like the comfort that an elasticated waist gives you when you’re eating. Oh yes, Rock…. and…. Roll.

Why not join in?

To learn more about the reasons that I started the Define ‘Normal’ blog hop click here. If you would like to join in the blog hop and tell us what your normal is like click on the link below and follow the instructions to add a link to your post. The subject of your entry is up to you, anything goes, show us a photo, a picture, dust off an old post that talks about any aspect of your normal life. Please link back to this post or duplicate the linky in your post to make sure the entries get as many views as possible. Don’t forget to tell us all on twitter using #definenormal and feel free to post your link on my Facebook page once you’ve linked up!

Last week’s amazing entries